Ok it’s time for me to do a little advertising…for the new Firefox 3!!! I’m doing this because I’m bored, there’s no other reason.
There’s only a few hours more before Download Day ends, so get your asses moving and start downloading. Yeah, at least do it for the sake of the cute “fire fox” above.
Now I know that I’m not cut out for advertising, because I have simply nothing to say. (Fine, I’m a sad case of fail)
Anyway…
Blah.
Sorry that we have not been posting for some time. But we would like to seek our readers’ understanding that it is due to the death of one of our members. *sob* As such, we have been busy with his retarded funeral. Trust me, it is not something that we want to do; buts as members of Salablah we have no choice but to show some ‘concern’ for him. So hopefully everyone can accept our reason, and may our readers start to come back again.
Just to let you guys know, the guy who died; his name is Massive Lazy Fuckface VII. So all of you readers can go worship him in your homes.
For some reason, the Holy Guy Up There set this period of time to be the school holidays for the students in Singapore. And so, we (or rather I) have come up with a list of things to do during this period of time to counter boredom. Actually, anyone can do the stuff listed:
1. Stalk pretty/cute/beautiful/kawaii/good looking girls and scare the fuck out of them. This only applies to the males of course.
2. Have sex in the open at night. Even better if you are underaged.
3. Burn down your school and fuck your teachers.
4. Watch hardcore porn.
5. Read this blog regularly.
6. Comment on how to improve this “muthafuckin” lousy list.
So people, for fuck’s sake, please do comment on how to improve this list.
P.S. Yeah, I know this isn’t exactly an exciting post with lots of vulgarities like I promised previously. But who cares anyway.
Despite the the fact that most people are not physically disabled, there are very little comments for the previous post. How sad.
Anyway, the reader with the best (and only) answer for the previous post’s question is…….ADELINE!!! (I’m assuming that is your real name) And her reward will be a cookie from us; a very special cookie at that. That’s because it can only be seen but not eaten.
On the other hand, get ready for our next post. It’s going to be an exciting one, with lots of vulgarities thrown in. So there.
Blah. As our beloved administrator is a Buddhist, he probably celebrates Vesak Day. which might explain why he didn’t bother to post anything today. (Actually, he rarely posts)
Ok, anyway, some time ago, he made up something quite lame. But today I’ve decided to take the lameness to a whole new level by asking readers to solve the following question:
SPOT THE DIFFERENCE(S) BETWEEN THE TWO BLEACH MANGA COVERS BELOW:
Answer to be revealed in a few days’ time.
Refer to the article:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Josef_Fritzl
So there. I suppose that we being humans, still have some sense of justice left in us (at least I do, lol). And thus, we will want to burn that fucker/animal/bastard/!@#$%^&* named Josef Fritzl so badly for what he has done to his daughter, so that he’ll regret that he was ever born.
Holy fuck. Singapore’s famous blogger Xiaxue suggested:
“For maximum fairness, he ought to be locked in the very same dungeon for 24 years, then raped repeatedly by his own father in his ass!! (father also punished for shitty job of bringing up his shitty son)
And then, to simulate the pain of childbirth, he ought to have his dick dipped in concentrated acid for 7 times. For 63 months he has to walk around the place with a baby’s extra weight.
However, there is no way that this can be done to him, as he is already 73 and probably can’t live till 97, so this shall be, instead, done for 12 years with double the intensity of the rapes and the acid-dipping.
The only problem with this punishment is that he deserves it completely, so his suffering is probably less than that of Elisabeth’s, who did nothing to deserve this.
So, I will instead suggest that he simply gets his penis chopped off.
The method for doing so shall be to tie a knot with a piece of string on his penis, and slowly tighten it until it eventually drops off.”
Lol. I say, Xiaxue, that your idea of a punishment for that asshole is too lenient. I doubt having his penis chopped off or having it dipped in acid a few times is actually enough compensation for what he has done. Ok, to be fair, it can never be compensated. But he can be made to suffer hell for what he has done. And thus I propose the following steps:
1. Set fire to his dick and balls so that he has a first-degree burn there.
2. Use some sort of a machine to rip his balls from his body.
3. Use a knife to cut off whatever is left of the skin on the bastard’s dick.
4. Use a blender to mash up his ripped balls, and force feed him with it. (So that he’ll feel how it’s like to force your self upon others)
5. Splash concentrated sulphuric acid throughout his body.
6. Dip a stake in sulphuric acid and shove it up his anus every hour.
7. Gouge out his eyeballs.
8. Pierce his eardrums.
9. Now that he can’t see or hear, his world would be an empty hell… (hehe)
10. Twist all his joints till they break. (And holy fuck he won’t hear himself scream, ever. LOL)
11. Let loose hornets, rabid dogs, scorpions, centipedes, spiders on him till he dies.
12. Exhibit his body in public to let the whole world spit on him. (Classic lol)
13. Dissect his dead body, and implant a grenade into it. And he goes *KABOOM*.
Of course all of the above is to be done without anesthesia.
Lol, I can’t believe that i actually thought of the above. Any other suggestions on how to torture him would be greatly appreciated.
Pikachu. Charizard. Suicune. Palkia. And etc etc.
Now tell me: What do the above named things have in common?
The answer is pretty obvious. They’re all Pokemon. (lol)
Ok anyway this post is going to be about Pokemon, and why kids love them so much. Hopefully, it will also lead some parents in this little world to the inevitable conclusion that their kids can never escape the clutches of Pokemon.
Point 1: THEY ARE SO DAMN FUCKING CUTE! See the little Pikachu above? It looks awfully cute. And we all know that dumb little children can never resist cute stuff. It gets worse, for Pikachu is supposedly a heroic Pokemon because it always blasts a “Thunderbolt!!!” to blast Team Rocket or Team Faggots or Team Salablah or whatever loser villian away to eternal respawning hell.
Point 2: THE WORD “POKEMON” IS A CURSE. Mainly because of the way it’s spelt. In case you’re mentally retarded. Pokemon is spelt: P-O-K-E-M-O-N.
Which actually means: Pikachu Owns Kids Emotionally, Morning Or Night.
So parents out there, don’t despair if your kids are watching Pokemon uncontrollably. It’s just due to the evil curse designed to cheat little kids of money. Or perhaps it’s just that your parenting skills suck big time.
One of our authors happen to be in China right now; and so me being stupid, decided to ask:
Author 1: Does China have any dogs?
Author 2: No, all cooked.
Author 1: LOL
Author 2 : Serious, there are none on the streets. They’re probably smart enough to hide in the sewers or something.
Act “Seh” summore, wear this kind of Jacket.
As of this day, Mother’s day; it mark’s Salablah’s first post as well as it going public. We, being members of Salablah, hope that it would produce many many more posts with undying creativity.
That corny crap aside, since today is mother’s day. I was just wondering how Oedipus would celebrate Mother’s day and how did he actually blind himself.
He who fucks his Mum. Read the rest of this entry »
